


One-Upping the Offspring(s)

by slotumn



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Attempt at Humor, F/M, Future Fic, Kid Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:01:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22294459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slotumn/pseuds/slotumn
Summary: Claude and Lysithea's little shit kids are finally visiting their parents' homelands.They also know way less about their parents than they think.
Relationships: Cyril/Hilda Valentine Goneril, Lysithea von Ordelia/Claude von Riegan
Kudos: 11





	One-Upping the Offspring(s)

  
"...What the hell do you mean, our first cousin once removed--"

"Dad's cousin, basically."

"--yeah, that guy, what do you mean he's a king? What do you mean Dad "used to be" king? What the hell is a Death Knight? Not following this shit at all."

\---

The twins Judah and Nadia Ordelia tried not to have any preconceptions about their parents' homelands before visiting it, but neither of them tried to do the same about the preconceptions of their parents. 

Needless to say, they weren't quite prepared for the things they started hearing about their parents back in Fódlan. 

Nadia was far more verbally expressive about it than Judah, as usual, but both of them were essentially thinking the same thing-- should we even believe these people? 

Sure, their parents said they were trusted classmates and comrades-in-arms, but the older generation tended to get a kick out of messing with the younger, trying to see how much bullshit they could pass through before the kids caught on, and perhaps this was no exception. 

Hilda and Cyril Goneril's perplexities were entirely genuine, however. 

"Claude and Lysithea really didn't tell you guys anything? Nothing about the war? That had to have come up..."

"Yeah, it's difficult to leave out that they, you know-- fought in a war that united Fódlan!"

Nadia frowned, somewhat offended at the (perceived) implication that they were dumbasses who didn't know anything about their own heritage, because her ego was both huge and easily scratched. 

"We know our basic Fódlan and Almyran history."

"They did mention that they fought in the war."

"And that there was also a magic goddess mercenary-turned-professor-turned-queen involved."

"Their former homeroom teacher at one point. Brushing shoulders with greatness, I suppose."

"Sure hope their teaching methods weren't influenced by her or anything, 'cause I don't want to throw hands with a magical god queen over all the dark magic exercise books I had to solve."

The pink-haired lady laughed while her husband coughed choking on tea, so the twins were on the verge of deciding that everything they heard was, indeed, bullshit. 

"...Do you two know who you were named after?"

"Dad's mentors."

"Yes, but do you know what sort of people they were?"

Judah gave his smartass-masquerading-as-blank stare. 

"Dad's mentors."

He was the sort of shithead teenager who thought repeating the same answer twice, but in a monotone voice, made him clever. 

When the couple to calmed down from laughing and choking some more, they exchanged a look. 

It was the same look the twins' parents used to exchange before baiting them into doing ridiculously intense flying and/or magic exercises.

"Oh, this will be fuuuun~"

"I'm going to be doing most of the explaining, aren't I."

\---

On that day, Judah and Nadia gained far more respect for their parents in an hour than they did in the seventeen years before it. 

And somewhere across the ocean, an married couple felt happy and gleeful for no particular reason. 

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted to write a fic about Claude and Lysithea's kids being little shits but then getting humbled a bit. 
> 
> Being a lot like their parents but also having an environment that wouldn't force them to grow up too fast would cause them to be nightmares during adolescence, in my opinion. They'd mellow out in adulthood, though, after they've had their share of insane wacky adventures and rebellions.
> 
> Details about why their parents didn't tell them the full story, how they took their mother's last names, and all those details will probably come somewhere in this series. Eventually.


End file.
